


Easing Into It

by papesdontsellthemselves



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Cooking, Cuddling & Snuggling, Ducks, Fluff and Humor, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Natasha Knows Things, Picnics, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Touch-Starved, Touchy-Feely, all the avengers live together, allusions to hot tub time machine, but its very slight, duck ponds, ew i hated that tag but, im just bad at tagging, its cute, lotsss of fluff, she just knows them all too well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-12
Updated: 2019-07-12
Packaged: 2020-06-26 22:05:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19777378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/papesdontsellthemselves/pseuds/papesdontsellthemselves
Summary: Steve and Bucky have been together for a while, but the prospect of them being able to be openly in love is still foreign to them.  After all, the 40s were a very different time.ORI find it hard to believe that Steve and Bucky would be together in the future with no weariness.  SO, here's a little fic about them easing into the notion that PDA is okay!  And so is their relationship!





	Easing Into It

**Author's Note:**

> TW: i don't think there are any? maybe very slight internalized homophobia, but i dont even think this classifies as that

“-And so Sam fuckin’ throws the orange juice carton and it hits Clint in the ass and- Buck? Are you listening?”

Steve frowns, watching Bucky as he stares intently just past him. His hands are laced together in front of him, thumbs tucked under his chin. He’s pouting slightly, his eyes squinting the way they do when he’s intrigued by something- studying something. He gets the same look on his face when he’s reading or cooking. His coffee is abandoned on the table, steam long since lost in the cool morning breeze and outdoor air conditioning of the little cafe they’d wandered into after their morning run.

“Hm?” Bucky hums, still not looking at Steve.

Steve’s frown deepens, concern pooling inadvertently in his gut as he follows Bucky’s gaze, twisting his head to look over his own shoulder. Behind him, a couple of girls are seated at a table, hands laced together as they sip their own drinks. One of the girls laughs at something the other one said and lifts her hand to kiss it. 

Steve blinks and turns back to Bucky, “Stop staring,” he murmurs, shifting to block the girls from Bucky’s view, “Might not be well received if they catch you.”

Bucky seems to snap out of his trance, shaking his head a little as he focuses back on Steve, “Right, oops,” he clears his throat, pushing a hand through his hair and scratching the back of his head before picking up his coffee and taking a long gulp.

Steve watches him, “What’s up?”

Bucky takes another sip of his coffee, then places it on the table and pushes it away from him, “It’s too sweet. Don’t ever let me get that caramel macchiato bullshit again-”

“Not what I meant, pal,” Steve chuckles, then sobers, leaning forward a little, “You were zoned in on those girls for ages. What’s up?”

Bucky seems to shrink in on himself, hands linking together again under his chin as he curls forwards. He doesn’t speak immediately, eyes cast downwards and eyebrows scrunched up. He looks like a confused puppy. 

Finally, he looks at Steve, “It’s just..weird, you know?”

Steve raises an eyebrow and Bucky rushes to amend his words, “No, not them. Not...what they’re doing, it’s just. Weird. Like, of course I don’t have a problem with it- that would be incredibly hypocritical considering we shove our tongues down each others throats nightly-”

“-Buck-”

“-But, just, it’s strange seeing people be so...open? And of course I’m aware that things are more...liberal now, but I guess missing that growth within the queer community kinda jarred me? Like, I get that we can be open and shit now, but...I don’t know what I’m saying.”

Steve sits back, allowing Bucky’s words to sink in, “No, I get it…” he says, slowly, toying with the edge of his saucer, “I also know that we’re technically safe and if we were to express our...affections more, um, publicly, no one would judge. Well, not no one I suppose, but we most likely wouldn’t be outwardly ridiculed. And, that’s strange. Like, even though logically I know that, part of me is still scared that a cop is gonna hop out and arrest us.”

“Exactly!” Bucky says, snapping and pointing at Steve, “Exactly...God, the world’s changed so much, I can’t keep up.”

Steve nods, huffing out a dull laugh, “I feel that.”

Bucky’s face falls back into a pout and he opens his mouth, but closes it quickly.

“What?” Steve prompts. Bucky looks suddenly nervous again.

“Does it ever bother you?” He sounds timid, like he shouldn’t be asking the question.

“Does what ever bother me?” Steve asks, tilting his head a little. As well as he’s able to read Bucky, he’s being especially difficult right now.

“Like,” Bucky bites his lip, he looks a bit constipated. Steve would tease him about it if he didn’t look so troubled, “We’re so touchy-feely when it’s just us, but as soon as we’re with other people, that stops. Does that ever bother you?”

Steve studies him for a moment, calculating, “Does it bother _you?_ ”

Bucky looks at Steve, “I don’t know,” he answers honestly.

Steve nods slowly, “Would you wanna do more...PDA?”

Bucky frowns and Steve chuckles, “Public display of affection, aka, Sam and Nat.”

“Oh,” Bucky nods, “Right, uh, I don’t know? Yes? But I don’t know if I...can.”

Steve sips his coffee, “Yeah, same.”

XXX

“It smells amazing in here, Buck, whatcha making?”

Steve pads up behind Bucky, wrapping his arms around the other man’s waist and perching his chin on his shoulder. Bucky leans back into him slightly, stirring what looked fried pork in with red wine and tomato sauce. 

“Moldavian stew,” he reaches over for a cutting board covered in chopped-onions and uses the wooden spoon to scrape them in, “It’s a Romanian dish. Ma used to make it, I think.”

Steve nods, pleased that Bucky’s memory is continuously expanding, even still, “She did. She used to make heaps of it then send you to school with the leftovers. You’d always share half with me.”

Bucky smiles fondly, placing a lid over the stew and setting the spoon down on a paper towel. He turns around in Steve’s arms and wraps his own around Steve’s torso, planting a small kiss on his forehead.

“God, I was so selfless, wasn’t I?” His tone has a teasing lilt to it and Steve laughs.

“You sure were.”

“Hey, lovebirds, smells good.”

Steve and Bucky startle, jumping apart at the presence of a new voice. 

“Jesus, Nat, don’t do that,” Steve scowls, fighting the blush that’s threatening to rise on his cheeks. He steals a glance at Bucky, who’s unabashedly red in the face.

“Don’t do what?” Natasha asks innocently, crossing to the pot and lifting the lid, taking a whiff, “Mm, Moldavian stew? I’m assuming this is your work, James?”

Bucky swallows and nods, “Uh, yeah,” he sounds uncomfortable, like a teenager after being caught making out behind a school.

Natasha rolls her eyes, replacing the lid on the pot, “Relax, you two. We’re all adults here, it’s nothing we aren’t used to. Be the happy couple you are.”

Steve and Bucky catch each other’s gaze, a shared thought between them. Natasha hadn’t said anything regarding their sexuality- hadn’t acknowledged that they’re _both men_. She’d simply grouped it in with all the other relationships in the house. Normalized it.

“Oh, don’t have an aneurysm,” Natashsa crosses back towards the kitchen entrance, grabbing a coke can along the way, “How long ‘til dinner?”

“Oh, uh,” Bucky closes his gaping mouth, “Like, ten minutes tops?”

“Great, I’ll go get the others.”

They watch her go, a fair amount of distance still between them.

“You know,” Bucky is the first to break the silence, “I don’t think I’ll ever get over how-”

“Unnerving she is?” Steve says, “Yeah, me neither.”

XXX

Steve cradles the back of Bucky’s head, biting down softly on his lower lip. Bucky hums happily, pulling back and pecking his lips one more time before settling down against Steve’s chest.

The room is dark, but Steve can still see Bucky’s eyes, glinting up at him. He smiles, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead, before hugging him impossibly closer. 

“So, I was thinking,” Steve began, nestling further into the pillows.

“Mm, that’s alarming,” Bucky murmurs. Steve glares down at him, unamused.

“Sorry,” Bucky says, though he sounds incredibly unapologetic, “Continue.”

“As I was saying,” Steve plows forward, “I was thinking that, like, since you brought it up the other day, we could try easing into PDA type stuff?”

Bucky freezes, blinking up at him, “Oh?”

“Yeah,” Steve reaches up a hand and pushes it through his hair, noting distantly that he needs a haircut, “Like, after Nat was so...chill today, I figure we could just start with being more openly affectionate around them? Get comfy with it in a safe environment and then go from there? If you’re okay with that, of course.”

Bucky contemplates for a moment, picking at a thread on Steve’s night shirt, “Yeah,” he says, sounding a little giddy, “I’m okay with that.”

Steve grins, “Awesome.”

XXX

“Hot Tub Time Machine!”

“No, Clint, for the last time, we are _not watching Hot Tub Time Machine,_ ” Natasha groans, sinking into the couch next to Sam and distributing a few bowls of popcorn.

Movie nights were some of Steve’s favorites at the compound. It was rare that all the Avengers were able to spend time together in good spirits, discounting dinner and such. And even then, not everyone was always present.

It gave them all an opportunity to pretend that some things in their lives were _normal_. That they had the liberty to crack open a few beers, pop copious amounts of popcorn, and watch bad movies. Besides, Steve and Bucky both had some serious television culture to catch up on.

“Why not?” Clint whines, seated in front of the tv like a child, remote in hand, “It’s fucking _funny_ and there’s an actor in it that looks like Bucky!”

Bucky barks out a confused laugh, “I’m sorry, what?”

“Actually, I can confirm that there is, indeed, an actor that looks scarily like you,” Tony pipes up, “Like, nearly identical. Like, imagine you, but with bad eighties hair and a patriotism complex.”

“Huh,” Bucky looks amused, “that’s ironic considering I was a Russian assassin for, like, 70 years and didn’t get to live out the 80s,” he paused, “I mean, I did, but I was either frozen or murdering people,” he stops, noticing everyone’s slightly horrified gazes on him, “Sorry, gotta work on that.”

“Anyway,” Thor says, clapping his hands together, “Let us return to the decision making. I personally elect that we watch this movie that has an actor that looks like Bucky. I think that would be greatly amusing.”

“Ha!” Clint pumps a triumphant fist, “I got the god on my side.”

“Honestly, I kinda wanna watch it,” Bucky says, rubbing his neck sheepishly.

“I wouldn’t mind seeing it again,” Tony shrugs, “I only ever watched it stoned and that certainly was an experience. I bet it’s not as good sober, but, I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt.”

“Yeah, I’m convinced,” Steve adds, turning an apologetic eye on Natasha, “looks like you’re outnumbered.”

“Babe, back me up,” Natasha pleads, looking at Sam.

Sam winces, “Actually, that’s lowkey one of my favorite movies…”

“Ugh, you all are awful,” Natasha shakes her head, “Fine, but I pick the movie next week.”

“Deal,” Clint grins, hitting play excitedly.

They all lapse into silence as the title screen plays, the only noise being the occasional clink of a beer bottle and the crunching of popcorn kernels.

Steve shifts a little closer to Bucky, offering him some popcorn from his bowl. Bucky smiles, taking a handful before moving the bowl out from between them. Before Steve can give him a questionable look, Bucky has settled into his side, head leaning on his shoulder.

“This okay?” He whispers.

Steve looks around at everyone else fixated on the TV, not batting an eye at the two of them cuddled together. He catches Natasha’s eye from across the couch, who gives him a knowing look and an encouraging nod.

He smiles, relaxing as he wraps an arm around Bucky, “Yeah, pal, it’s okay.”

XXX

Casual displays of affection around the compound are displayed increasingly frequently between Steve and Bucky as the weeks go by. A couple movie nights pass with them cuddling closer and closer until one night, they’re practically spooned together on the sofa. The others still diligently ignore them, the only form of acknowledgment coming from Sam, who fondly calls them out for ‘being too big as two fucking supersoldiers to stretch out like that’. But beyond that, they’re overlooked. 

It’s nice, Steve thinks, to live in a world where what they are is so unapologetically normal. It was something he dreamed about in the 40s- something he laid awake at night yearning for. And now to finally have it is thrilling.

They don’t jump apart when people catch them hugging or cuddling around the house. Hand holding has become a favorite activity of Bucky’s, who likes to lace their fingers together and drum little rhythms on Steve’s knuckles. Steve likes it, too. It’s grounding in a way he can’t explain.

It’s normal now for them to be openly loving when they’re around the rest of the team, but they have yet to so much as brush shoulders in public. Something about that notion still makes Steve’s stomach turn. It feels too personal for the world to see, too intense.

He would like to join in with the other couples, walking through parks with their hands linked and exchanging casual kisses, but there’s still a dam somewhere in his brain that’s keeping him from carrying through. Something still screams danger.

It’s a Tuesday afternoon when the curse is finally broken. It’s a rarely pleasant July day. The usual humidity that clings to the air is absent and the temperatures are barely pressing 80 degrees, so Steve and Bucky decide to pack a little lunch and venture down to Central Park.

They’re walking comfortably side by side. Steve’s got a portable cooler clasped tightly in one hand and Bucky is carrying the drinks. People are out and about- more so than usual- clearly taking advantage of the weather. It’s nice to be a part of.

“Hey, remember when that pond was smaller?” Bucky pulls Steve out of his thoughts as he gestures to a large duck-pond with the lemonade jug he’s holding.

Steve smiles a little, fond memories inching to the forefront of his mind, “Yeah, your mom used to give us burnt loaves of bread to feed the ducks with.”

“Yeah,” Bucky laughs, “God, and there was that one time you fell in? I thought you were choking on the water, but you were really just laughing.”

“I almost forgot that happened,” Steve says, eyes trained on the pond as they near it, “god, I was an idiot. How did I even fall in?”

“I think you were trying to save one of the ducks from choking on some bread and you leaned a little too far forward,” Bucky shakes his head, eyes squeezed shut as he laughs, “I think it quacked so loud when you fell in that it spit the bread back up.”

“Hey!” Steve says, a playful glint to his eyes, “It worked, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, I suppose,” Bucky rolls his eyes, “C’mon, let’s go see the ducks.”

He grabs Steve’s hand and pulls him towards the pond. Steve just barely remembers to move his legs, too transfixed on their links fingers and presence of _people around them_. But almost as quickly as his heartbeat spikes, it calms. He forces himself to relax a little as they sidle up next to the pond, looking over the edge at the ducks. No one is paying attention and if they are, who cares? It’s not something they can get in trouble for anymore, so why let a little fear stop them from openly loving each other? He’s Captain fucking America for god’s sake.

Bucky squeezes his hand once they slow to a stop, casting him a tentative, questioning look.

Steve smiles at him, squeezing his hand back, “C’mon,” he says, motioning towards the pond with his head, “let’s feed the ducks.”

Bucky beams and Steve wants to capture that moment forever, sketch it in ink and keep it.

The rest of their afternoon in the Park is spent cuddled together on a picnic blanket. When they’re finished, they walk back towards the compound, hands swinging back and forth between them. 

It’s freeing; like a weight has been lifted off of Steve’s shoulders. Being dumped into the future was jarring- terrifying. But maybe, just maybe, it’s worth it. If for nothing, then for moments like these.

They stop at a crosswalk and Steve leans down, surprising them both when he presses a quick kiss to Bucky’s lips.

Bucky smiles up at him, “Love you, Stevie.”

Steve rubs his thumb over Bucky’s, “Love you, too, Buck.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading, chiefs!  
> feedback is always appreciated


End file.
